PHIL GAWEN (4) "Daddy's Home"


(All words and music by Phil Gawen)

I was so down, no one around.
I had a devil deep inside of my soul.
Nobody dared to exorcise it, I know,
I had a bad attitude.

Push and shoving, all or nothing.
I didn't care about morals or values.
I didn't think they made the world go round.
Thinking heavy.

If this is a dream I am in,
Please let me wake up now.
So many years it has been,
Please let me touch those clouds.

I want to dream of birds.
I want to pray inside a church.
I want to love and touch.
I want to have another chance at living.

I was so glad, friends and gray plaid.
Was this a miracle that took me by storm?
No time to think, I'm paid to do what I'm told.
And I was flying so high.

If that was a dream I was in,
I couldn't wake up then.
And after the blood, sweat and tears,
Don't think I'll ever win.

I know, I've sinned.
So, I will pray inside a church.
I want to beat and kick and hurt.
I want to have another chance at living,
Chance at giving, chance at winning.
So, they let me go.

I was so down, no one around.
He had a feeling that he couldn't control.
He didn't know how, so he had to fold.
No more chances. Shit!


Paper Flowers

(All words and music by Phil Gawen)

Say you will, begin to touch me where it
Likes me so much, I could dream, some more.
Time goes by so slow with you,
It was inevitable, that I should love you.
And now you are a memory, a memory,
Sitting on my window.

I can't call you darling,
So, I will control my feelings.
I'll keep him deep inside.
So lonely as the days go by.

But I nailed myself to a cross,
And I swore some things I'd never swear.
And you can take me for everything I've got.
Time's running faster than the fastest clock.

It's ticking in my head and in my heart,
It's ticking everywhere, my love is burning hot.
You play with matches, you play with fire, fire.

Paper flowers, I can't find a single paper flower.
It was inevitable, yeah.
As I'm singing this tune,
Cutting the line to the womb.


Justice for All

(All words and music by Itzel Garcia/Phil Gawen)

You left her bleeding, left her broken.
But you won't get away this time.
The evidence she has will do,
When she goes up the steps to testify.

And when they lock you up,
And hopefully next to some big lonely guy
Named Bubba.
He'll love you while you're there,
And you do your time, sing prison.
Justice for all, the best revenge.

You messed around with her,
But even criminals have mothers.
Don't worry, you'll make friends,
With dudes that like to play you up
In real-time, justice for all.

And don't you hesitate,
You'll have 5 years or more with Bubba.
And when she thinks of you,
She'll smile from ear-to-ear ,without shedding tears.
Thanks a Bubba.

Won't see them from behind.
You'll suffer for the things they’ll do,
In time, they'll explain:
What you did to her, she's gonna do to you.
You made your last mistake,
You're going to learn to like your new life.
Justice for all.
The best revenge, sing prison.


Shaded Faces

(All words and music by Itzel Garcia/Phil Gawen)

A picture on my wall to remind me of you.
Never lasting. A silhouette, a shaded face.
It's all I have in my memory.
You left me hurt, wrapped up inside.
You didn't care for me.
You said I'd bleed, I'd even die.
You laughed, 'cause you can't see.

I'm untouchable. I'm a dreamer.
I can fly, oh I can do anything.
That's all I want to remind me of you.
Your lies and your stabbing knifes.
That's all I want, to remind me of you.
That's all I have, to remind me of you.

For what reason should I go on?
Got to get up when you fall.
Has my life ended or just begun?
Was it special after?
I'll meet better people, yes it's true.
Your picture’s fading faster now.
Your envy's burning holes in walls.
Your picture's sinking, it'll fall.

I'd like to thank you. I am stronger now.
I'll never hurt, never like you hurt me before.
That's all I want, to remind me of you.
Feelings of accomplishment.
That's all I want, to remind me of you.
Learning to get by again.
You had your fun, you had your fun.
Who's the one that's laughing now?
That's all I want to remind me of you.



(All words and music by Phil Gawen)

Browntown, all I see, is a devil’s circle,
Of take and take, and a slow mo attitude.
Browntown, all I hear, from kids who love to dream,
I want to get out of here.

Some towns can pull together,
Pull strings for now or nevers.
A realistic chance for progress,
When they put their money where their mouth is.

On the ball, to make things happen.
Lesser evils, lesser greed, for a solid cause,
Growth and stability and lower unemployment.

Browntown, all I see, is mixed up priorities
And selfish thrills.
Browntown, all I know, is that I can't take another day.
I've had my fill.

Browntown, to wake up one day and believe in something.
Browntown, do it today, before hearts start breaking.
Browntown, say what you mean and do what you can
For your old losing town.

Browntown, all I see is, a one way street.
Where the rich get rich and the poor get pitiful.
Browntown, all I see, is a devil's circle
Of take and take and slow-mo attitudes.

This town's a gold mine, blessings and all,
A time bomb without the circuitry.
Some people say they like it this way.
I don't agree, I'm not the only one.

Big posters for a small election,
And everybody seems to fear the worst.
It's been happening here for years and years.
Only little things get done,
Little things in…Browntown…
Do it today, not mañana.


One way out

(All words and music by Phil Gawen)

We'll, it's a long way there.
And here is where you're on your knees,
Praying for a chance in life.
Keeping all your dreams alive.

And it seems, dreams, follow you.
No more rocks to turn,
No more lessons learned.
In the scheme of things,
Heaven's dead.
With a little piece of hope,
Like water and bread.

Oh leave it, leave it alone now.
Why don't you leave it, leave it alone.
Take it or leave it, today ‘cause
There's only one way out.
There is only one way out!

With a smile like that, you can hide the pain.
Live your life in vain.
But you will never forget.
Baby, always regret,
That you don't like these games.


Daddy's Home

(All words and music by Phil Gawen/Itzel Garcia)
Mickey and me were out in the yard,
Playing hide and seek.
The sun was out and the heat was on,
And we started getting bored.

Mickey said: let's go by the store,
And buy a piece of gum.
Casually, Mickey dropped a box,
Of matches on the floor.

Mickey and me, we lit some leaves,
That had fallen from a tree.
So amazed, we gathered some more,
Despite a little breeze.

The fire raged way out of control.
So, we hid as the cars went by.
And when we returned, or mother said:
Wait ‘till your daddy's home.

Mickey and me, ‘gonna spend some time,
Together for a while.
We'll play some games and watch TV,
And now it's time for lunch.
I don't quite know just where we are.
But mom said she would come.
On Tuesdays and on Thursdays,
When daddy isn't home.

Daddy's home.



(All words and music by Itzel Garcia/PhilGawen)
I'm lost in time, ‘can't run away.
I wish I could finally find a key.
But the path goes astray.

It seems like I'm going slow mo.
In this fast paced world, we all know.
Sometimes I'm better off,
When I learn to laugh, than succeed.

There used to be a day when,
Everything was so new.
Just like the day I was born.
But now that time has gone by.
I feel like I'm just getting older.
I just can't give in.

It's not important, if they try to shoot you down.
Just remember, who you are.
Don't be a follower.
Make your own trails and you will see,
How other people follow.

A hang glider is landing.
It looks as though he's never
Touched down before in his life.

I picture what he's feeling.
But I feel like I am stealing,
Something to prove my own strife.

I made a promise to myself,
Long ago.
To hardly ever get disturbed,
When you say:

Don't be a follower.
They'll make you promises they can't keep.
Don't be a follower.
See how the  people follow.



(All words and music by Phil Gawen)

Oh, like a rabid dog, so Sphinx-like,
Reawakens every day and every place,
So uncontrollable it seems like.
There are feelings that you have,
Bet you do, and that is dangerous.
With a little intimidation I can break you,
Make you crawl.

We have visions in the dark.
Truth and armor ready to be slaughtered,
By our empty hearts.
It seems much easier, to let it in.
Let it rule are every part.
A utopian Camelot.

One manifesto.

For every positive there’s a negative,
Separate and strong.
That does not mean that one creates the other one,
No, no.
There is no such thing as good from wrong,
Or bad from right,
It is the thing we must accept,
And master all our lives.

There is nothing more to it.
But its action is the hardest thing,
To learn and do, to make us free.
It is the fire in my heart.
As long as I am close enough,
There's always hope that I will see.

One manifesto.

Catholic, Protestant, politician, atheist,
Jewish, Moslem, Shia blitz,
Buddhist, fascist, Hinduist,
Communism, socialism, Democrat, Republican,
Contra, Sandinista, pro or contra individualist.
Royalty, chivalry, feminist, chauvinist,
Racist, black and white, brown, yellow,

Let's have another piece on Earth.
There's never been a peace on Earth.
I only see one big Earth.

There are countless die,
In the hands of a million lives.
And such disbelief in the word "together".
There's a reason, there's a cause.
Throw away those poker cards.

We have visions in the dark.
Truth and armor ready to be slaughtered,
By our empty hearts.
So, keep the fire in your hearts.
As long as you keep close enough,
There's always hope that you may see…

One manifesto.






(All words and music by Gawenda/Solar)

Yesterday's so far today,
And we’re so many miles away.
Though I'm not complaining,
I felt safer in my younger days.

And we try like crazy.
Like fools and rainbows and pots of gold.
It's all so uncertain.
And we can't see the forest for all those trees.

So much more to offer,
But every other way is just as hard.
'Takes some guts to really make it happen.
Speeding down our open road.

Dreams for you, dreams for me.
What is it that we wanted to see?
Make believe, but you can't fool me.
What is it that we wanted to be?

There is no pretending,
We are who we are.
There is no time for lending,
When you reach for the far.

And we make our mistakes.
Puts us inches away from our mental guillotines.
But we have to forget,
And recapture the momentum in telescopic view.

Blinding lights are changing colors,
Sweat is splashing through the sound.
Rhythm synchronizing, heartbeat pounding,
Pumping our adrenaline.

Do we have the same dreams?
Keep ourselves alive.
And to be satisfied, dream ourselves to life.

There are times of depression,
And moments of glory,
And a state of solid limbo,
Like clockwork to a "T".
And it's all so real.
When you feel those chills.




(All words and music by Phil Gawen)

Voices of love are the heart of utopia.
Voices of love are the strongest militia.
Energy taking a ride in a human form.
Can't ever die, it's a soul that maybe reborn.

Voices, voices, voices, voices.
Voices of love, voices of flesh and blood.
Heaven above, heaven is invisible.
When we are old, body is old, wrinkled and cold.
Still in our minds, voices of love grow stronger.

Voices of love, greater than life.
Voices of love, trapped in time.
Voices of love, imprisoned by flesh and blood.

When we embrace, holding you now and forever.
When we engage, whispering doubt in our makers.
Closing my ears, mouth, eyes, thighs now and forever.
Circles of love, touching the eyes of my maker.

Voices of love, greater than life.
Voices of love, trapped in time.

Voices of love are the meaning of everything.
Driving our will to say: “I can do anything”.
The more that you learn about science and stranger
The more it unfolds, satisfying your every whim.

Voices of love are the heart of utopia.
Voices of love are the strongest militia.
Energy taking a ride in the human form.
Can't ever die, it's a soul that can be reborn.

Don't you ignore all those big, big déjà vus’.
So get it right, this lifetime's full of the blues.

Voices of love have a vision of being free.
Voices of love have a dream about everything.
Voices are wisdom, love is a kingdom.


Follow your Heart

(All words and music by Gawenda/Itzel Garcia)

When I said these words to you,
I meant every word I said.
Don't give in, if you believe.
You can't. All you do is follow, 
Just follow your heart.

And here you are once again.
You realize your mistakes.
This time, go and look back,
And you will see,
You followed someone's idea,
But not your very own mind.

Rainbow clouds will follow you around,
Until the darkest part has passed.
Don't forget, go on look back,
‘Cause the darkest part has passed.

And you can help yourself,
Like no one else, if you just
Get to the heart of this life you want.
And if you make it big,
Don't forget what you did.
Follow your heart, your own heart.


Live Forever

(All words and music by Itzel Garcia/Gawenda)

Sitting, late at night.
Talking to me when I'm feeling down.
You were, worth the wait.
Can't live without my best friend.

Searching, for someone,
To trust, ‘cause it hurts to feel alone.
Let down, but I kept looking, for you ‘cause,
Life goes on.

If you should die, you'll live forever,
In me, ‘cause life goes on.
Don't worry about tomorrow,
‘Cause you got me here today.

If you need me, I can be there
And help you wipe away your sorrows.
Just believe in me, when I say:
You live in me forever and today.